It scares me...

... to know that the probability of a person supporting the Nuclear Disarmament movement in India is 1 out of 11!!

that was the result of a group discussion that we had in college the other day..i was obviously the unpopular one. so in all fairness..the probability could be much lower..in fact it is...

the reasons given for a nuclear india are the same old ones...credible detrrence theory and the no first use policy...which is supposed to make us look like saints in a world that is racing ahead in the arms race.

to begin with the credible deterrence theory is a hoax...nothing stopped Kargil despite going nuclear...the BJP didn't even win the election on the basis of the Kargil victory..which proves that people who send their kids to war are the ones who are most against it...so stop selling us your idea of jingoism.

secondly, the no first use policy contradicts itself...coz if you don't use it the first time..you won't even be alive the second time around to use it anyway...and if you really mean what you say and do believe in no first use..then why the hell are we spending so much in accumulating more of something that we are never going to use? what a farce!

where does all this lead us anyway..we go nuclear..Pakistan follows...then we follow them again...then they try to match up...so on and so forth...playing a game that only ends in a loss for both parties..wasting useful resources even as millions starve.

But thanks to the Great Indian Middle Class these theories will continue to do their rounds...just like someone in the discussion endorsed it.."We need to go nuclear so that we will be the most feared and the most respected in the world."

the parameters for any kind of debate on nuclearisation are so constricted right now in the country that each party irrespective of their ideology, left or right, actually stakes their claim to who got the idea of going nuclear first. media obviously hasn't been spared and unfortunately academicians too have decided to toe the party line...and the result is that the only group that actually cries out against the arms race is frightfully a minority.

so have people really never heard of Hiroshima and Nagasaki or have people just decided to willingly erase their memories about it? or do we just enjoy living in an increasingly unsafe world where there is always this impending threat of being bombed away beyond recognition?

but then again i guess, there isn't much one can do when the President of the country himself subscribes to these theories.

Ray the Rockstar! (Part III) concluded. (only for now...)

Shatranj Ke Khiladi!

what a script! the man does it again...hilarious...
a political satire on the waning Mughal Empire (of course it still holds true of the Indian government)...indulgent emperors who were there only to serve as titular heads...and a whole class of courtiers...who were nothing but rent seekers (reminiscent of the indian bureaucracy)...but the movie i guess has proved to be timeless so far...

Amjad Khan was brilliant with his expressions...the pained look right thru the film...and the spontaneous breaking into a song everytime there comes up a serious issue of concern...my personal favourite was when he is holding a private court with his select ministers and is actually wondering where he went wrong as a king..."my subjects still sing my songs...ask the british if they have known of any other king who is as popular among his subjects?"

General Outram who compares Wajid Ali Shah's harem to a military regiment...haha..

and of course sanjeev kumar and sayeed jaffrey as the ministers who have time for nothing else but chess..so much so that there is almost a willing ignorance of the fall of the empire...and the last of the dialogues is too poignant..when jaffrey bemoans the fall of Awadh.." Let's play another round of chess...this time a rapid one...just like the British do..", says Sanjeev kumar..." and when it's dark, we'll go back home... we need the darkness to hide our faces."

the landscapes are brilliant...camera work as usual commendable...my favourite moment...when jafferey cheats by moving kumar's chess piece in his absence and the camera sneaks in from a gap in thw wall to let go of the secret...

but one thing that left me most impressed was the witty script!! brilliant i hope is a word that can complement Ray's genius!

Ray the Rockstar! (Part II)

Pather Panchali...

overwhelmingly beautiful...the imagery, the narration, and the soulful depths to which the camera could carry the human eye...and of course let's not forget the simple humour...subtle and yet very lifting...

simply love the way ray gives birth to hope everytime you feel let down by the miseries of poverty weighing down apu and his family...

and what a way to signify the birth of hope...tadpoles creating ripples as they sprint about in the water...water lillies swaying...durga planting a new sapling as she grows to see to new desires...and the finality of it with the lashing rain....and even as you begin to hope...it's that very rain that takes it away from you...and then the celebration of the human spirit which refuses to let go...there's always a new beginning...no matter what.

you have the watch the extent to which ray belives in continuity...for instance the first scene in which durga lifts kittens out of the pot to feed them water...they are there,frocliking...falling over each other...or just simply there... till the end of the whole sequence...
and the long cuts...awesome...and despite that you never really get bored...coz of the variety of shots he has used...and when he zooms in slowly to capture the sorrow or the excitement in the mother's face or Apu's wonder...

the humour is very subtle...and like i said...simple...whether it is the trumpet blower's quivering moustache...as apu looks up at him...or even the old aunt who is constantly bickering with the mother and keeps threatening to leave...her expressions are hilarious!

the musical score (composed by Ravi Shankar in a record time of 9 hours) proves to a fine accompaniment to the narrative...builds and lifts at times and at places...more than substitutes for missing dialogues...

If there was a dignified way to show human poverty...it was definitely Ray who could show it...so much so that the audience all over the world no matter how far away from the early years of the century and the dwellings of poverty they may be...they cannot help but empathise with the family...

Ray the Rockstar!

of Goopy Gyne Bagha Byne...
superficially about two village idiots...
but the movie is so much more than that...
a simple tale...much like a folktale or even a fairytale for that matter...
simplistically and innocently hilarious...
so many little messages passed on to you...
about the discontentment of man no matter what...
about the pointlessness of war...
and then almost immediately...Ray brings you back to the reality of the film's characters Goopy and Bagha...when Bagha looks at his would be bride and says,
"she'll do!"

Tailpiece
Legend has it that two student representatives in my batch decided to have a Ray film festival during the last semester. So they approach the SPIC Macay group which hosts indian classical music concerts to promote an appreciation of Indian culture amongst Indian youth.
So the kids ask the Spic Macay dude, " We were wondering if you could help us organise a Ray Film Festival? (i mean these Spic Macapy guys are pretty well connected you see...)
SMdude: Of course, in fact we could probably even have Ray talking about his films.
Student reps: Really! that would be awesome!
but legend also has it that before they put up a notice about the same and invoked Ray from the ashes, a noble soul informed them about his death and put the matter to rest.
do i love this place or do i love this place?

Dear Suhas

How i wish we could be five again and the biggest problem for us would be to wonder what my mum has packed for me in my tiffin box or if we would get selected in a team while playing 'Chor Police'
How i wish i could just rewind to even about five years back...and we would just be sitting on that damn wall, doing absolutely nothing...
And talk absolutely nothing for hours and yet leave with a feeling that we had the best conversation ever...
And talk about the pointlessness of hope...and the end of expectations...
And how we pledged to meet exactly 10 years from then and wonder how each of us had grown...
And how we wondered (and still wonder) why we never fought...
And of the fifteen years that i spent in the colony, the best years were the ones after we became friends.
And all those hours spent putting thought bubbles to people's heads...
Going back to the colony will no longer be the same...though the strange attachment to the wall remains...almost signifying a comforting permanence of things...

...i still respect you.

coz' i haven't seen too many people who work that hard for their students...
coz' you made me feel on par with students who were far ahead of me...
coz' you didn't laugh off my silly doubts...
coz' you sat there patiently even on weekends...answering each question in detail.
maybe things have changed for you now...
so they have been telling you things about me...
and you choose to listen to them.
so you react the way you do...
but, "hate" is a strong word you know...(and your subconscience let you down today.)
and you chose to keep it cryptic just when i laughed it off...
i choose not to explain myself to anyone anymore. hence i will let it be.
just wanted to let you know that i stuck my neck out for you when they tried to run you down. i was alone then.
i am alone now. and i will still stick my neck out for you.
coz' teachers like you are hard to come by.

You won't be afraid...

...of being the last man standing

If you weren't the last one to stand up.

:)

I am thankful that...

1) Bill Watterson's Calvin never grows up!

2) I get happy when i eat chocolate.Being happy was never simpler. and it's scientifically proven too...

3) I know how to ride a cycle.

4) I can eat alone, stay alone, sleep alone, stand alone...

5) when joyie calls at the end of the week, I can make her laugh..not just laugh but i can crack her up!

Apology accepted!

It's beautiful....Vittorio De Sica's Bicycle thief...

and it's all there just like I did it in film appreciation class in Journalism school...

a penitent old italy apologising for its unwilling participation in the War...an ashamed young italy trying to hold up its honour ("some fine example you have set for your young son...", the crowd belittles Ricci, even as young bruno holds up his father's fallen hat...tears streming down his facehe continues to look up at his dad)...De Sica apologises most beautifully...through camera movements (the depth of field covered is superb) that sweep you through the aftermath of the war...the penury, the desparation, the regret and most importantly....the uselessness of war...

definitely a must watch!

will it fade away?

joyie says..it does..she gives a scientific explanation for it...thanks to a docu on nat geo...

the thrill of love she says won't last for too long...your body can't take it...it will make your mind give up...

but what about hope? will that go away too? is there a science to that too?

of the several ironies...

600 acres of newly freed land in mumbai...

and we will still have asia's largest slum.

A party that started to take up the cause of the mill workers...

and it's rebel leader now plans to construct a mall on mill land.

coz' i believe this needs to be read...

the author(a dear one..)prefers to remain anonymous...
-----------------------
of things i can't digest.
at least 12 have been killed in the fury and rage brought out by the
cartoons controversy of Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him). and one
of the home grown mulla MLAs from UP has put a 51 crore bounty on the
head of the cartoonist.
Think of a giant gorilla locked in a cage. Some pranksters come about
teasing him and throwing stones at it and mocking it. What does the
gorilla do. It gets angry and starts throwing his arms round at
anything that he can, sometimes hurting his other inmates and
sometimes, worse, himself. That's pretty much the story, where the
uneducated rioters being the gorilla.
They have tried to hurt the psyche of the average Muslim, but what the
Muslim fellow is forgetting is that the prophet (PBUH) cannot be
insulted. He is above all such things… and if some one read (with
meaning) his teachings and the Holy Quran, he would know. Clearly,
nothing happened in Denmark when the cartoons were first published.
The local Muslims were smart enough to ignore that and mark their
protest in a more meaningful way. It was these other power-hungry
mullahs that took them to the Arab world and the western media. For
those who don't know, the poor locals and security guards are dying
today for something published in September 2005!
And then, this is typical human mentality. Accept something only if it
is visible to you. If it's right in your face. As if you and I don't
know that there are people dying all over the world and our backyard
due to natural and man-made systems, but donations will come only when
you see Tsunami pictures on NDTV!
Dishonour in the path of the Prophet (PBUH) they said. Like they don't
know the rampant denial of things that the Prophet (PBUH) taught in
their very homes and their lifestyles. The continuous degradation of
the Muslim Community and its peaceful and constructive values, by the
same guys who are on the streets of Karachi and Libya protesting
something they don't know the consequence of. Or for that matter the
politics of.
Yakoob Quereshi, MLA from UP is trying hard to gain some footage,
which the Indian media is more than happy to give at the expense of
the ignorance and blood of the average uneducated Muslim from UP. UP
which has one of the largest cases of domestic rapes, uneducated
unemployed wasting their lives and rampant violation of women's
rights, will suddenly wake up to Islamic Morality for some views
somewhere in the world (most guys don't even know where Denmark is!)
There are enough conspiracy theories floating, regarding the timing of
the issues, which comes in the wake of the Hamas victory in Palestine
and the Iran Nuclear Issue.
I am hurt by what was published in the papers. I will mark my protest,
by telling someone who is willing to listen that the rioting was
precisely what the Prophet (PBUH) taught against.
It's like someone somewhere in Pentagon is winning at bet near the
water cooler, regarding the riots spreading across the world. And it's
people like the UP Mullah that have made the Muslim community a
laughing stock in the world media. After the Delhi blasts, the Times
of India carries an article headlined "Muslims condemn blasts". Oh
that's news, isn't it? I mean Muslims are supposed to condone by
default and if they don't, WOAH that's news. Try googling it " muslims
condemn blasts." V/S "any-other-religion condems blasts", you ll know
what I m talking about.
And there is no such thing as instigation. I believe every man has to
think for himself. Its only when everyone in the mob believes in a
particular thing and there is no information asymmetry between the
leader and the followers. Only then can you brand a particular
religion such-and-such. It makes me sick and depressed to know that
Muslims today are not like that. I know of one religion that is like
that and so has become tolerant at the same time its faith in itself
is unshakeable. It's called Mumbai. Try denying my logic. Here if the
Gurudwara is thoda far, the mumbaiite will go to the nearby Mandir
with as much faith, and bribe God with a wink.
I usually refrain from talking about my religion, but this time I just
couldn't take it. But millions of man-hours wasted, property destroyed
and end result? More news feed for FOX, SKY and BBC…and probably an
idea for a tshirt.

all safe...

no dogs chasing me yet...

:)

you know what...

for all those who love Gokhale for its tapri, hostel and parties and everything else that makes you happy..good for you!!

maybe i want something that Gokhale started out as an institute for...and really i don't owe anybody an explanation for what i feel...or how i go about getting to what i want and deserve...and i have been fortunate to find people who think on similar lines...though they maybe few in number.

as i see arguments haven't risen beyond name calling in some of the cases...as i can also see people don't seem to be trained in the art of reading between lines...

this is getting to be quite a yawn!

hence dialogue terminated. over and out!

dear all,

this is for all my seniors who are attached to Gokhale and love coming back...it's great to see you guys doing that...

about my comments on Gokhale...well what can i say?

i am glad that all you guys have read my blog with so much patience and have commented on my view...that was my aim anyway..to start a dialogue..after all we are all from the world's biggest and almost oldest democracy...i am really so glad that all you guys want to stand up for 'our' institute...that's exactly what i have been trying to do for the last two semesters...

Gokhale is an institute with a legacy...it had humble origins...started for a purpose...to promote learning and reasoning and develop the art of questioning...the need to see things objectively...the man who started the institute had that vision...and he questioned the right of the British Empire's rule...the biggest testament however to that is the silent banyan tree that stood witness to several converastions between Gokhale and the man the world calls mahatma..about the indian national movement...and that was the guy who even quesitoned his own people and chose to had over the movement for a free india to it's own people instead of confining it in the hands of a few 'educated' elite...and it (the banyan tree) stands silent even today...but if only each of you who called me a 'bitch' for speaking my mind could see what it has to say...

unfortunately, today this institute with one of the richest legacies is at a juncture where it may die a silent death...just like several other research institutes across the country...only coz' it's students only see it as a passport to a great job or an opportunity to earn a degree...for all of you who say that i haven't dared to say it in the open...maybe you guys weren't there when i was in the open speaking my mind...a lot more like you called me a 'leftist'(as if it were a bad word) and some even 'intellectually unsound'...dialogue is possible only with people who dare to disconnect themselves from the object of argument and see it objectively...

each day as i spoke to people about the deteriorating quality of research and the waning faculty..all i got was, " why is she so concerned?" or " aa gayi samaj sudharak.."

:) to all of you...

for me Gokhale is not a passport to a good job...it was meant to be a way of life...and for me this place was my passport to my coming back to pay a tribute to all the wisdom that has poured out of that place...the place that dared to question the way we measured poverty for one...how many of us have even dared to read the original paper?

for all of you who think i am a bitch for speaking my mind about the hostel...(some of it which was purely out of humour) a lot of it is felt by my fellow batchmates...only they prefer to keep it to themselves...i prefer speaking it out...not just on this blog (which i agree is my refrain from the world outside)..i have dared to say it in the open too...

guys...it's most unfortunate that all of you who chose to leave anonymous comments (and of course dearest abhigyan...)can't see how much i love this institute for all that it stood for...for most of you memories are probably made of the times spent in the hostel...for the girl who spent most of her time in the boys hostel...am glad that you found love in gokhale...for a lot of you it was all about the parties and the late night staying up...

maybe i have grown beyond that..coz i have stayed in a hostel before and have had my share of parties and late nights...for me this place is about its beliefs..and its ability to make its students question...something i find sorely missing today...tutorials today are just about finding out how many pages to cram...lectures are just for bunking and giving proxies...subjects are chosen to make sure you have the 'best'(and the trendiest) list of optionals in order to impress the corporate world...for me gokhale was my reason to say goodbye to the corporate world...it was my reason to free my mind from everything that is put forth as the 'right things to do'in order to have a great life...

for those of us who make a different choice in this world...we are branded as 'mentally challenged' or as 'freaks'...it happened in gokhale too..with me...with a lot of my contemporaries...it's happening even now...but i am glad that it is happening...helps me separate the wheat from the chaff...

the hostel that all of you adore is the most culturally biased place where people who are not part of the so called "cool mainstream" (which ironically is decided by a handful of people) are made to feel like social pariahs...it is where i can hear and see tall claims of liberated young women and men...but i am yet to see their minds liberate...class is where i see students being jeered for having different opinions or for daring to question...

today as some of the brightest minds are leaving the place forever and lots more are prevented from entering it (thanks to the petty politics)...it's most unfortunate that its current batch and its alumni are choosing to close their eyes and make themsleves feel comfortable by seeking refuge in the memories of its past...

i am glad that this blog has found its purpose by bringing forth such emotionally charged comments...but honestly guys...reserve your emotions...wake up and smell the coffee...the place you guys have such fond memories of may not even exist in the near future...

while i am glad that we are having this 'dialogue' albeit in the virutal world...it is most unfortunate that none of you have kept aside your emotions and questioned your own beliefs...none of you have even dared to see what a majority of its current batch of students feels about this place...

the way i see it..students make an institute more than an institute making its students...that's what makes the iits and dse and jnu and even gipe what it is...
i am sorry to use this profanity on my blog, but to put it as one of you put it, " if any of you has the 'balls' break away from your memories of this palce and stand up to be counted and help this place from sinking into oblivion...if any of you has the 'balls' question your own contribution to this place that has tried to endow you guys with knowledge and those prestigious jobs that you so proudly display on your cv's...and dare to question what's happening around of you...a lot of you come back even now to meet some of your juniors...listen to some of those voices that you never heard around you and you will see a discontent brewing...some of your own friends claim to be dissatisfied with this place...i hope they are honest about it...there are all kinds of dissatisfactions...some matter to me..some do not...and i am no one to make a judgement..to each his own...some are dissatisfied about having to attend class...some are dissatisfied about taking so many tests...some are dissatisfied with the quality of teaching...(i am most concerned about the last dissatisfaction)...maybe this doesen't matter to most of you who are at climbing very rapidly the ladders of 'success' at your respective corporate jobs...coz all that you leanr at gokhale would never help you at your job anyway...an mba would have been better...but it does to me and a handful of others (some of whom have even taken a loan to study) who want to enter academics and are forming their foundations now...it does for us who want to someday be a part of the process that transfers all this knoweledge and have decided to be a part of gokhale willingly...we have chosen this place...not resorted to this place...only when you belive as strongly in your dreams and are as passionate about your beliefs will you have the guts to stand up and criticise a place that you love...

love and best
vibha iyer

p.s. am quite surprised that you guys never read the post that declared my love for this place and that stated that some of my best moments are spent attending class...maybe that was beyond you guys anyway

pps. to the rest of the world that posted on my blog...thanks for the good wishes...and the never ending vociferous support...i owe you one!!